things I didn't see coming

- having 13 exciting but exhausting interviews in 2 terribly long but terribly short weeks

- loving every single person I've gotten to talk to during these 13 exciting but exhausting interviews in these 2 terribly long but terribly short weeks

- a no-notice overnight road trip to Nashville

- Nerlens Noel tearing his ACL (I kid you not, this has legitimately been making me sad)

- the random snow flurries yesterday, and a lot of other days, that just keep coming back

- flowers + dark chocolate + fruit snacks + car mail + etc. Valentine's Day surprise package

- that this would be one of the most whirlwind months of my entire life

- the way that my heart is feeling life lately even in the midst of this being one of the most whirlwind months of my entire life.  A lot of times when things get crazy, I go into autopilot.  My feet take me places, my mouth speaks words, my body and hands move, but my mind and heart withdraw.  But somehow lately, my mind, body, and spirit seem to be moving as one.  Which is pretty exhausting, actually - to let myself feel the real weight of everything that is going on.  But I like it better this way.  It's kind of scary, but it's real, and, after all, there is never anything to be afraid of...  Does this even make sense?  This probably doesn't even make sense.  And that's ok.  I didn't really see myself writing that either, but keeping with the theme of the post, the stream-of-conscious rambling can stay.

The list could go on for a long time.  Basically, I have no idea what is going on lately, and it's overwhelming, but it's awesome.  There's a lot more I should be journalling about, and definitely some things that are blog-worthy too, but since it's moving so fast I'm obliged to just keep moving along with it.  But it should slow down soon, I think.  Once I get this appellate brief written.  Yeah, I'm going to go work on that right now actually.

Before I go, here's some music for your Sunday afternoon.  This is probably my new favorite!

Enjoy the day, friends, and celebrate this truth with me.  (Also my new favorite!)

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things, at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

[2 Corinthians 9:8]

the times, they are a-changin'

October has slipped into November.  70 degrees has changed to 40.   The general law school attitude has changed from distant thoughts of finals to panic because finals are now only a month away, and a month cannot possibly be long enough.  I want the break to come quickly so that I can see my brothers and sisters in Mississippi, go to Maine, celebrate the holidays, and rest.  But at the same time, I am scared of what I face until then, and while I would consider myself more emotionally stable than a lot of people at this point, I'm just saying.  If I could get a hold of Hermione's time-turner, I would be totally down with that.  

But the times, they are a-changin', and if I have been in denial about that at all, I have had this tree to remind me.  I pass it every day, on the way to school and back.  And it's as good an example as any that 

The leaves have changed,

changed some more,

and finally fallen.

Can a girl get a pause button around these parts?  Where does the time (and the leaves!) go?

But that's the challenge, isn't it?  We want life to speed up, we want life to slow down, but regardless of our personal desires and wishes life goes on.  The only real choice is to go on with it.  So here's to embracing the changin' times - the new month (although I will always and forever mourn the end of October), the colder weather, the barren trees, even the studying.  It will all be beautiful in its own way, regardless of what anyone tries to tell us.

Even still - if you want to find me a time-turner or a pause button for the sake of my Contracts exam...  I'm just throwing that out there.  This may be the hardest month and a half of my life to date, but tonight, at least, I think I'm feeling up for the challenge.  Outlining, flashcard making, tea, and apple pie await...

come gather 'round people wherever you roam

and admit that the waters around you have grown

and accept it that soon you'll be drenched to the bone,

if your time to you is worth savin', 

then you better start swimmin' or you'll sink like a stone

for the times, they are a-changin'...

[bob dylan]

goodbye thesis + quote(s) of the day

Reason #328971 my brothers and sisters are champions: they rocked my thesis defense this afternoon.  Seriously.  It had very little to do with me.  They made everything so much smoother and stress-free than I could possibly imagine.  I knew a few friends would come, but I had no idea they all would.  The looks on my 3 readers’ faces when they showed up to a totally filled room was pretty priceless.  (As was our collective reaction when a random but super sweet stranger rolled up in the room singing the “Let the Lower Lights Be Burning” hymn…story for another time.)  But truly, the support I have from these people consistently blows my mind.  Hours later and my heart is still so full.  I kind of don’t know how to handle it. 

On top of the joy I have from finishing my thesis and doing it with the people I love, this conversation that took place afterwards still has me laughing.  Make that reason #328972…

David: “Look at our cult friends.” 

Emily: “Yeah, don’t forget to wear the shirt tomorrow!”

David: “Wait, what?”

Emily: “Tomorrow, we’re all matching…”

David: (confused looks)

Me: “This is the problem!  You actually think us all wearing a matching shirt is a legitimate possibility!”

 Mary Margaret: “Wait, we’re getting family reunion t-shirts?  YESSS!”

Ohhh the joys of brother/sisterhood.  Headed to sleep tonight with sweet dreams of love and friendship family and the fact that the thesis weight (which was heavier than I thought it was) has been lifted from my shoulders.  Sweet dreams to you too, and happy May 1.  I have a good feeling...while seemingly impossible, May is going to be a good month, somehow.

reunited (and it feels so good)

One week in to Spring Semester 2012 and ohhh what a whirlwind it has been so far! It is so good to be back at the Brick House, back with my brothers and sisters, back in the wonderful town of Oxford, etc. etc. etc.

First things first, we kicked off the semester with a camping trip last Friday night! Why sit around and talk inside when you can go outside with a fire, a lake, beautiful stars, and Julie's homemade blackberry wine cake? One minor problem...the severe thunderstorms/tornado watch that occurred around 2 in the morning. Perhaps that was a lack of planning on our part...but what can I say? We were really excited to see each other again after the break.

Milkshake Monday this week resulted in more people crammed in the Brick House than you can possibly imagine. So many best friends, soon-to-be friends, international students who we barely know... If you are anywhere near Oxford on a Monday night, I'm telling you, you have to come. I cannot explain how fun/overwhelming/beautiful it is. You would be amazed to see the ways that sharing a milkshake leads to sharing the Gospel.

Anna and I are taking Ceramics this semester. Not as easy as it looks. Which was to be expected, but still. It's very fun, very time-consuming, very challenging, and probably going to teach me more about life than all of my other classes combined.

I think that's about it as far as back-to-school news is concerned. The rest is just normal life in Oxford: bonfires, brother-sister breakfast, good conversations, me trying to avoid working on my thesis, LOTS of Settlers of Catan, my English class that might as well be National Treasure (ok, that's not normal at all, but more on that another time...), etc.

I always forget how full-speed-ahead life in Oxford is. It's a bit of an adjustment, for sure, but in the best of ways. I want to take advantage of every single second of this semester, and I'm thankful for friends that intend to do the same.

Why is it...

...that technology beckons more during finals week than during any other week of the year?

...that I find it easy to study everything except for the very class I should be studying the most?

...that senioritis is real, and shuts you down so much more than you would think?

...that the weather during exams always matches the mood? (Freezing and misting, of course.)

...that the more we have to do, the more my friends and I crave time together?

...that we have to graduate and cannot simply stay in college, together, forever, for the rest of our lives?

FOUR days until the beach. I really, really wish that the end of this week didn't mean being separated from all of my friends for so long, but at the same time I am quite ready to be finished with classes for a while. I am trying to stay on top of things, but I have 0 motivation. Which is why I'm writing this right now instead of studying Contracts Law or researching the Holiness Movement during the Modern Period. Obviously.

Are you studying right now too? Should you be studying now? (That's probably the better question.) Get back to the books and I will too. But first...celebrate the season with Sufjan Stevens Songs for Christmas! All day, every day. Here's a jumpstart.

school's out for the summer

The end of school/start of summer transition was especially chaotic this year, for various reasons. Here's a recap of what's been going on.

[PART ONE: end of school]
Finals' week presents the question - is it better to be very disciplined and study gradually over a long period of time, or keep hanging out with your friends whenever you want and have a blast and then be forced to stay up all night writing a paper on Moby-Dick's relationship to 19th-century America? This year, my approach was totally the latter. Play while everyone's awake, then work while others are sleeping. 3:00 in the morning isn't so bad if the daytime fun makes it worth it. What am I going to remember in 30 years, anyway? A sleepless night full of history essays, or a sunset at Sardis, spontaneous trip to Gum Tree, and dinner with friends? I think we both know the answer. All this to say, school was ROUGH the last few days, but everything worked out just fine in the end.

[note to self/others...procrastinating in Spanish = more problematic than procrastinating in English. proyecto final took me an eternity even if it was about fútbol.]

[PART TWO: fun-filled weekend]
Some people aren't going to follow me for this part, but others will immediately understand. I made it back to Wilmore just in time to change clothes and get to work helping with the Francis Asbury Society Building Dedication Ceremony weekend. Extremely busy but absolutely awesome way to kick off the summer. People from all over the country, and, really, all over the world, came together for camp-meeting style preaching, fellowship, celebration, and prayer for the new FAS Ministry Center. The weekend was, naturally, filled with encounters with lots of people who I don't know but who know me (shout out to my fellow preachers' kids, I know you understand that one!). We also got some bonding time with some of our closest friends and Laura's and my "adopted" big brother and sister from New Jersey! We are so blessed. I will explain FAS in detail later, but for now, this will tell you everything you need to know.

Ministry Center Video Tour from The Francis Asbury Society on Vimeo.

[PART THREE: everything else]
Since the weekend, I have unpacked, done a lot of work organizing the August Guatemala trip, worked some (but of course not enough) in the LSAT practice book, clocked in a good number of hours at the FAS building, and (no surprise) started reading a C.S. Lewis book. Kentucky is beautiful in the summer. I'm looking forward to all of the adventures that I'm sure are on the way.

where your treasure is

Bad news, guys. My History 303 Emerging Nation notebook is missing.

This is a problem for several reasons. 1. Finals are approaching and I need to study. 2. I have some OCD issues when it comes to my history classes and don't trust anyone else's notes. 3. Did I mention it's almost finals week? I need to study...

I realized the notebook was missing first thing Monday morning. Since then, I have checked my desk, behind my desk, under my bed, my car, Bishop, Bondurant, the Library, and the student government office. No luck anywhere. At a school the size of Ole Miss, the chances of finding it are looking pretty slim. But sometime Tuesday afternoon, the thought hit me. I have clocked in a considerable amount of time looking for this notebook, and I've been really searching for it. Searching hard. Reminds me of a story of someone else who lost something once...

Suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Does she not light a lamp, sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, 'Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.' In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents. [Luke 15:8-10]

I'm searching for a notebook so I can make a good grade on a final. How much more so does our Heavenly Father seek after His lost children?

Second thought, while we're on this whole "searching" thing:

You will seek Me and you will find Me when you seek Me with all of your heart. [Jeremiah 29:13]

I have sought after this notebook all week. How does that match up to how I am seeking after the Father?

For the record, I'm about as stressed out about the notebook as I ever am about anything else like this in life. Which means on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being high stress), this is maybe a 3.5. I really should complain about it less. It is a bit of a predicament, but, hey, it's providing me with some good life perspectives. Walks with friends, a little bit of stalking the royal wedding, and the fact that Nathan got a new puppy and let me play with it today totally all outweigh the whole notebook thing. Inconvenient? Yes. Crisis-worthy? No. I'd rather exhaust my energy spending time with my friends and truly searching for that which matters most - my Savior.

pastry heaven

Hello, Lusa's Pastry Café, 1120 North Lamar, Oxford, MS. If you haven't been, you should go. Tomorrow.

I've been camped out here the last several hours, reading Machiavelli's The Prince, searching the library's Methodist church databases, and looking up fútbol statistics for Barcelona and Real Madrid. (You wish you had my classes, don't you?)

I just might be able to handle my schoolwork if it means hanging out here all day.

free scantrons.

Tuesday was election day for ASB candidates. I ended up being the campaign manager for Taylor McGraw, who has been one of my friends since freshmen year. As you can imagine, the past two weeks have been packed with work to do, and Monday and Tuesday were especially chaotic. Lucky for us, all of the hard work paid off! Taylor won with 50.46% of the vote. How crazy is that?! Every vote counts.

I am always so humbled and impressed to see how much of a team effort things like this are. All of the organization I did hinged on whether or not people would actually step up and help out. I was so surprised by how much some Kappa Sigs rose to the occasion! Everyone who helped with the campaign did an awesome job. I am lucky to have made some amazing new friends and to have strengthened the friendships that I already had.

Picture on the front page of the Daily Mississippian on Wednesday morning.

Our campaign team, minus Tyler and Lennie.

One of my favorite things is the overwhelming sense of accomplishment you feel after all is said and done, and you see the people you experienced this with again. Example: the morning after bid day when I saw Emily at breakfast. You can never quite look at people the same way again after something like this, knowing that you did it, and you did it together. That's how Tuesday night was when we all met up again, and it's been the same yesterday and today anytime I run into any of them. All of the candidates ran great races, and most were extremely close. But for now, we can't help but be excited that Taylor came out on top!

friends > finals.

During finals week, everything seems like a good idea, because everything is better than studying. I absolutely love the ridiculous ideas my friends and I come up with. Last year, we agreed/made a bet to get blogs. This year we've been discussing our many plans for our Christmas break and random plans for our futures i.e. how to stay connected when we're married with kids and living who knows where in the country. As the studying becomes more and more frustrating, the conversation gets even better and the plans get even crazier. The frightening thing about this year is that we've already discussed some really outrageous, spontaneous things, and it's only Monday.

Obviously, my friends are a bright light in the midst of finals darkness. If I'm going to be overwhelmed with truth tables and court cases, it's nice to have other people be equally as overwhelmed at the same time. Simply having so many amazing people to constantly keep me smiling is just about the greatest thing I could ever ask for. Of course, the studying is really the least of the things we've been encouraging each other through lately. Just looking back on this weekend is proof that we've all, collectively, had a really intense semester where we've grown in so many ways. One Sunday morning at the Orchard at the beginning of the year, Pat said that "friendship is a celebration of inefficiency;" this has been beyond true all semester, and it's true again right now.

Efficiency, this week at least, would mean refusing to get sucked in to the distractions and the randomness. It would mean saying no to study breaks and snack breaks and exercise breaks and all those other breaks that seem essential right about now. Inefficiency, however, means agreeing to the breaks, and being spontaneous. It means stopping to have a long conversation in the hallway or at the dinner table even though it's seriously cutting in to the study time. It means enjoying this week a heck of a lot more than you would if you're merely trying to be efficient.

So here's to inefficiency, and here's to finals. What seems so bad can really be so good - having the right people with you is what makes all the difference.

it is time.

The mood has hit. (Told you it would happen in a couple of days!). It is officially time to go back to school, and, now that I'm ready for it, I can't wait. I'm not saying that I'm ready for hours of homework and waking up early and never being able to find a parking space. I am saying that I'm ready for campus to be full of people again and food to be readily available and, most of all, for my friends to all be together again.

It's the same every year - two things trigger my back to school mindset. Two of my favorite things in this world, at that. Number one: school supplies. You're laughing, I know. I don't know what it is, I just like shopping for school supplies. I'm very specific about it too. (Ask my mom, who patiently waited in WalMart for far too long while I searched for a red notebook. It had to be red. I was just in the mood for red that day. I have no idea why.)

Number two: Harry Potter. Nothing makes me more ready for school to start than reading Harry Potter. I read some every August, just to make me excited to go back. I've read them all far too many times, but a few days ago I picked up seven again. Seriously, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is a masterpiece; J.K. Rowling is brilliant. (I could go on about this for days, but I'll spare you, for now at least.) Something about the fact that all of Harry's adventures take place at Hogwarts makes me excited for my adventures that are on the way here at Ole Miss.

Ridiculous as it sounds, these two things have entirely put me in the mood to be back in school over the course of the past week. Now that I'm officially back in Oxford for the fall, I'm having a difficult containing my excitement for all of the things that are to come. With friends arriving any day now, my adventures just might be beginning sooner than I think...